Uusis Institute of Curling today published their latest endeavor on solving the mysteries of basic calculus.
Scientists around the world were astonished by the results. "This is the greatest leap for humankind since sliced bread. It's really quite awesome!" comments Isaac Newton.
That dude who discovered the classic formula E=MC2
now admits the UIOC formula is superior:Markku Uusipaavalniemi + 1 = M-16 5.56mm Semiautomatic Rifle
"This discovery could very well lead to the TOTAL ANNIHILATION of Canada" comments Chief Scientist King Midas from the Department of turning Stone into Gold.